Friday, July 3, 2009

Serve and Protect

Ha ha hahahaha!!

Lol chuckle snort chuckle!!

Hahaha lmao rofl ha!

I don’t think I’ve ever been laughed at by a crack dealer so hard in my life. Thanks a lot, Charley.

It's merely a natural reaction to his experiencing a new paradigmatic style of law enforcement, Frank.

Chuckle chuckle … Mu’fu’er had paper caps in his pistol … Caps! Like he gone surprise me off the corner or some shizz. Chuckle.

Yeah, seems to be working real well there, Charley.

"Freeze!!" ... chuckle chuckle ... Mu'fu'er said "FREEZE!!"

PURR: Peacefully Undertaken Resistance and Restraint. It will take the streets time to adapt.

You should try it sometime, Frank.

Ha ha ha … What’s next? Pillow fights instead of back alley beatdowns? Silly string instead of mace? Chuckle chuckle

Don’t make me pull over and come back there.

Hey, don’t tickle me, bro! lol

In order to transform the black community’s pathologically negative perception of the police, it’s time we redefine what we mean by “Serve and Protect,” Frank.

We should assume our role as officers of the law more as facilitators of legal conduct than as deliverers of procedural punishment.

Do you understand what would be the consequences of easing up on criminal activity in African American neighborhoods? There’d be absolute chaos!

[Prostitution-to-order at every corner liquor store!]

Drug and alcohol abuse in the stairwells of every under-funded school!

Yeah, MLK Boulevards nationwide would become the “Wild West” thoroughfare of every major city with all the shooting and looting that would go down!

See? Even dope-dealing Dusty in the back seat understands.

Understand it? I overstand it.

What good have we actually done if we dump ol’ Dusty the Rockslinger back there in jail? The man’s a natural born fundraiser … a salesman.

Throwing him in the slammer would just be leeching more talent and potential out of his already inspiration-deficient community.

What would you propose then?

Give him a purpose ...

[... an upstanding job.]

[We set him up to solicit donations for the local chapter of UNCF, making a healthy 17% commission.]

He thrives, sets a positive example for others in his community; more local high school grads get to go to college. Everybody wins!

Yeah, yeah … I like the sound of that.

And suddenly, options begin to open up. Incarceration wouldn’t be the only recourse for black male survival.

I wouldn’t be living at home with my mama anymore.

[And he’d have the motivation to support his slew of illegitimate children because he’d be earning his money by socially respectable means.]

And not by flipping quarter-pounders at the local Greasy Burger.

Come on, Frank. Give PURR a chance.

Yeah, Frank, give PURR a chance.

If you don’t hush up back there, I’m gonna give BARK and BITE a chance on you with a K-9 officer back at the station!


Yeah, that’s right: ♬♪Dogs gonna bark / Dogs gonna bite / But if you don’t shut up / I gonna use my night- / stick on you!♬♪

♬♪Yes, it’s true. Black and blue—nightstick on you.♬♪


♬♪Night. Stick. On. You.♬♪

Frank! Look out! Incoming!

Sweet mother of—


That guy had to be running 85 mph, at least!

And driving west in the eastbound lane, no less.

Better reload your cap gun, Sarge.

No doubt! It’s time to serve and protect!

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